About a year ago, I quietly stepped away from writing my blog. There wasn’t one big decision behind it. Life simply changed, and my priorities changed with it.
In February 2020, my husband, John, was diagnosed with prostate cancer. It was unexpected and marked the beginning of a journey neither of us could have imagined.
Shortly after his diagnosis, John wrote something in the middle of the night. As fear and uncertainty weighed heavily on him, he felt God speaking to him. He wrote about faith and about remembering that there is nothing God gives us that God cannot handle. He ended with words that guided him throughout the years of illness that followed:
“In the middle of the night, I was given the cure for this cancer…it’s called FAITH.”
John also wrote that even if cancer eventually took his life here on earth, it still could not beat him because he believed there was a better life waiting for him in heaven.
You can read what John wrote here:
For more than five years, cancer became part of our everyday lives. There were radiation treatments, PET scans, chemotherapy, countless doctor appointments, good news, difficult news, and always another option to research as we continued to hope and pray.
Over the past year, writing moved further and further down my list. I still enjoyed creating content and sharing little pieces of my life, but sitting down to write required something I didn’t have much of at the time- a clear mind.
What mattered most was helping John fight cancer.
As his wife, I stood beside him. I went to appointments, asked the doctors questions, helped him through treatments, and cared for him when he wasn’t feeling well. We fought this battle against cancer side by side.
I often joked that life was turning out exactly as we had promised each other at the altar on our wedding day: for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health.
Toward the end, we were hoping John would be able to participate in a clinical trial. But after a fall that resulted in a broken hip, his body never recovered well enough for that to happen.
Even the circumstances surrounding his death became complicated. The coroner changed his death certificate twice while determining whether his death was caused by the fall or by the cancer.
For me, though, that question really didn’t matter.
Cancer may have changed the course of our lives, and the fall may have changed the course of his final weeks, but neither of those things will ever define his life.
John was so much more than the way he left this world.
Over the past month, I have received an incredible amount of love, kindness, and support. Messages have come from people I know personally, as well as from so many of you whom I have come to know through social media.
And you reminded me of something I had forgotten along the way: how much I truly enjoy this connection.
I miss writing.
I miss sharing fashion, beauty, cooking, travel, and all of the everyday things that make life interesting. And now, I’m ready to find out what my next chapter looks like.
For more than 46 years, so much of my life was “us.” Now I’m learning how to navigate life more independently and discover a little more about “me.”
The truth is, I’ve never really lived on my own. I didn’t go away to college, and I went straight from my childhood home into marriage and a life with my husband. So in many ways, this is completely new territory for me.
There are moments when I find myself questioning my identity and wondering, Who am I now?
Then there are other moments when I look at it differently as an opportunity to discover something new about myself, grow more independent, and see where this next chapter takes me.
There will still be fashion, travel, food, family, and all of the things that have always been part of A Two Drink Minimum. But there may also be conversations about navigating grief, starting over, cooking for one, finding my way, and learning how to move forward differently.
I’m excited to begin writing again because it is something I truly enjoy. And connecting with other women has been one of the greatest gifts that came from starting this blog with my daughter, Brittany.
So, after months of putting blog posts aside, here I am, back at my computer.
I don’t know exactly what this next chapter will look like. But I’m ready to discover it.
And I’m hoping that by sharing my stories, I can continue to inspire other women while, perhaps, inspiring myself along the way, too.
Cheers. 🥂
Nancy
Nancy, I truly loved you , and John, he will be truly missed. I am so glad that you’re getting back to writing. I love your blog and I love the name “Two drink minimum “. The name can’t get any better than that. I would really love to get together with you and have an early dinner or cocktails.. I’m always here if you need to talk love you girl , you’re beautiful inside and out.❌⭕️🥂🌺SJ
Hello Shannon,
You’ve been such a wonderful supporter all along, and I’m happy that we’ve become friends. Thank you and hope to see you soon. Here in Naples.
Nancy, this topic is dear to so many women our age. Whether you are going through it directly or watching friends and acquaintances going through it, it is an unfortunate outcome of living into your 70s and beyond. I just returned to Florida yesterday and found out today that the wonderful woman who puts together our Friday 9 holer group has died. I’m just shocked. When I said goodbye to her last June, she looked fine. I don’t know if she was ill, but she definitely did not show it! So, for most of us, we look to women like you, who share your journey…because in life, it is inevitable ❤️🌹
Hello Robin,
It’s nice hearing from you. I know that you know a little more of the personal side to John’s (Journey). Life is very fragile and sadly the older we get we realize how valuable each and every day is. It’s sad to learn that someone you expected to see when you returned back to Naples is gone. I’m sorry that happened to you. Death certainly has a way of putting things in perspective. It teaches that life is truly a gift.
Take care,
Nancy
I love that you are back to writing again. It is like hearing from a dear friend, we have all missed you.
Hello Anne,
I’m happy to be back here. In fact, the wonderful comments and support I have received has made me feel validated. Writing allows me to slow down and sit in stillness.. and this is a time when I remind myself how blessed I am. I look forward to this next journey and I’m keeping an open mind and heart.
It is so good to have you back….My husband was diagnosed with prostrate cancer in late 2025. After surgery and 35 daily radiation treatments, we are cautiously optomistic. We will wait for a test in early 2027 (to get a clear number after drug and radiation have left his system). Thank you for your honesty and gentle spirit.
What a beautiful post, Nancy. I’ve enjoyed following you on social media for years, love reading your kind and thoughtful words, and look forward to sharing this new journey with you.
You are truly an inspiration!
Debi
Hello Debi,
I can’t tell you how excited I am to be back here. I took off time because I needed to be with family and that’s where my priorities were. But I have missed this and all the wonderful ladies that I have met because of this blog. Thank you for being a part of it. 🙂
Nancy, I have missed you. I’m so sorry for your very deep and profound loss. Please accept my heartfelt condolences.
Welcome back, and wishing you a soft landing as you navigate your new normal.
Most truly,
Hello Paula,
I had to smile, reading your last comment about the soft landing because I honestly have no direction as to where this is going. I’m excited and I look forward to this new chapter. Writing gives me a chance to be creative as well as learn. And one thing I do know for sure I’m not ready to slow down yet.
Cheers,
Nancy
Nancy. I did not know until just now of your husband’s passing. Please know how sorry I am. The past year I have been struggling with aging and stopped following many of the lovely women influencers due to feeling lesser than or not good as when comparing myself to others. Silly, I know, as we are all beautiful in our own ways. I am wishing you strength and happiness in your new journey. XOXO ~ Liz S.
Hello Liz,
I want you to know that I’ve sent you an email. I’m sorry to hear that you felt uncomfortable comparing yourself to other women. But you also mentioned we are all beautiful in our own way, and beauty comes from within. Please try and remember that it’s not about the number of years or aging. It’s about the quality of life. Focus on living a purposeful life and you’ll find confidence in yourself you never knew you had.
Thank you for following me and always feel free to reach out.
Cheers,
Nancy
I am deeply sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing your journey, and I’m so happy to see you back in my inbox.
Hello Janet,
I’m happy that you’re happy to see me back in your inbox. 😉 It has been a while and I’ve really missed writing and connecting with other women here. I appreciate your following along and I hope to continue to stay connected.
Cheers,
Nancy
You are such an engaging writer Nancy! And you are a inspiring example of resilience and grace.
Im happy and Im sure all of your followers are happy that you are back to writing.
Hi debi,
I always appreciate hearing from you and your friendship is very important to me. Thank you for all the support you showed both John and I.